Bad Habits are Hard to Break

I really didn’t think I’d have to be writing this post this soon. I knew it was going to come eventually – I’m a massive procrastinator – but I figured I’d have at least a month or so. Nope.

All I have to lay at the feet of it is that I have really bad habits, that I’ve had for a long, long time. Pushing past them is harder than I thought. I’d figured once I got into the hang of it, it would be easy to keep going…then school started, and people here started getting sick, and…everything else just sort of fell down the cracks.

I will say that I -have- been making a conscious effort to eat better or, at least, not eat as much during meals. Sometimes it’s worked, sometimes it hasn’t. But Crissy and I went grocery shopping the other day, and not only did we make an effort to get good, healthy things – we didn’t break down and buy any junk food, ice cream, or soda. That’s right, my refrigerator is purposely soda free for the first time in…gosh…YEARS. I’ve got a couple of bottles sitting outside the fridge, but they were there before we went shopping, and I’m basically using them as a trick that a friend taught me – have them there, so I know I can have some if I want it, but I know that I don’t HAVE to. It’s not forbidden. It’s not a matter of not having any. It’s just making the conscious choice to have something else instead.

So Brian’s tax refund from his amendment came in finally. We got rent paid with it, put money on a bill or two, bought a new fan for the bathroom, lamp for the living room, and a lamp for Crissy’s room, paid for our marriage retreat in October…and I got Just Dance 2 and EA Sports Active 2. So, as soon as I get my regime started again, those will be added. This is what I think my plan will be:

Sunday: Rest Day
Monday: WiiFit Body Test and Yoga, EA Sports Active Workout Plan
Tuesday: WiiFit Body Test and Yoga, Just Dance’s Just Sweat
Wednesday: WiiFit Body Test, Yoga, and Balance Games
Thursday: WiiFit Body Test and Yoga, EA Sports Active Workout Plan
Friday: WiiFit Body Test and Yoga, Just Dance’s Just Sweat
Saturday: WiiFit Body Test and Yoga

I think one of my biggest problems is finding the time. I don’t have the discipline to get up early in the morning and do it – I know it would be best if I did, because I’d be invigorated for the day and ready to go. As yet, though, I find it hard to get to bed before 1am, and I enjoy sleep. Once I do get up, the kids are minutes away from going to school, and Josh won’t leave me alone for five minutes, let alone the hour I want to devote to a workout. Once the kids get home from school, they have chores and homework – and they take FOREVER doing these things. Oftentimes, they’re still doing them when Brian gets home, which usually isn’t until 7 or 8 in the evening. He gets home, and I don’t want to bother him to watch Josh so I can do my workout when all he wants to do is sit down and relax and watch some TV. You’re not supposed to workout right before bed, because that can mess up your sleep.

Obviously, the best time for me to do it would be sometime early morning, before Josh wakes up, so I can have ‘me’ time without being bothered by everyone else. But…God, I’m not a morning person. At all.

I suppose, though…doing this -has- to be about self-discipline. So I have to find it somewhere.

Just a Little Something

Alright, so I’ve been a REALLY bad llama. I’ve been telling myself that skipping one day won’t hurt, so long as it doesn’t turn into a habit. And I do have a reason! The last two days have been very busy with getting the kids ready for school, and today was their first day back. On top of that, I have seriously felt like C R A P the last two days.

Structured exercise was pretty much a no-go, but I didn’t not do anything. Like that double negative there? I did. I helped at the back-to-school rally, manning the PTO table, which pretty much involved standing and talking to people for two hours. Anyone that says calories aren’t burned just by standing when you’d rather be sitting can suck it. Really. Today had looked like I wouldn’t get much of anything done – like I said, I felt really bad, and didn’t feel like moving from the floor, let alone exercising. But! The copy of Just Dance 2 that Crissy rented from Blockbuster came in the mail today, so we went to Ron and Erin’s, and Erin and I tried it out. Let me tell you –  we were just on the regular mode, and I was sweating my butt off. There’s a setting on there called ‘Just Sweat’ that’s supposed to be aimed at burning calories, so I might try that tomorrow after doing my body test and some yoga on the WiiFit. My check-in that was supposed to be today will be done tomorrow.

Wootness.

Nothing Strenuous

Today was a relatively quiet, uneventful day. As far as my goals, that is. We walked down to the street fair again, to go to the car show and let the kids on some of the rides. It was super hot, and the bees were out en force, but it wasn’t too bad. After walking around down around the cars, among which this one –

(my favorite!) – was present, we went back up to the street. I got the funnel cake that I promised myself, along with a coke, and we settled down to eat…but ended up having to walk back to the van to eat our goodies (Brian’s elephant ear, the kids’ funnel cake) because the bees were insistent upon sharing our goodies…and we were feeling quite selfish and, you know, unwilling to get stung. Eventually, we headed back to the street and took the kids around to get on some of the rides. We had been about to head home when, while I was selecting my stuffed animal for throwing a ball (which was clocked at 28 mph! go me!), Crissy showed up! She’d been sleeping when we left. After selecting my animal –  we walked around some more, including back down to the car show briefly and then up to the nearby covered bridge so I could take some pictures – of which I did get some nice ones, the kids getting on another ride, and letting Crissy see what sort of fatty goodness she wanted to get. Then, it was time to go and see if the blood donation bus was open. It hadn’t been when I walked down a couple hours earlier, but it was then. After filling out the paperwork, they got me up, stuck my finger (iron was at 14.4, which is good, because I have a history of being slightly anemic, which keeps me from donating sometimes), and then got me set up.

That’s where it got -fun-. I normally donate from my right arm. Now, I’m saying normally, but I haven’t actually had a successful donation since I was about 21 years old. Either way, I’d never had a problem with it before. This time, though, they had trouble finding a vein, then, once they did stick me, the blood was very slow coming out, and then just…stopped. After trying for several minutes, they decided to try my other arm, which I was, of course, all for. I’m O-negative, and I’m a staunch supporter of donating if you’re able, especially now that I’m close with someone who has benefitted from a blood transfusion before. So they got my left arm all prepped, and…good to go! Good flow, all that jazz.

 I got my juice and cookies…and shortly thereafter, I got some fish (>.> what can I say, it’s good!), and we headed home. I was instructed not to do anything strenuous for the rest of the night, and to take in lots of fluids over the next 24 hours…so no workout today, but I don’t feel too bad, since we did do a lot of walking, and I may at least go and do a little yoga, just to keep in the habit of doing something every day. All in all…good day! I hope everyone is having a great weekend!

A Noted Absence

No, not an absence of mine. But something I noticed that was lacking here.

My first few posts have just been, basically, a journal. I could do that easily enough with a diary, if that was the only thing that mattered. It’s been nice to get comments, but…there’s nothing to really hold any sort of accountability for me.

So what do I need? I need a goal. I need something to count down to. I need incentives. I need motivation, visible, tangible motivation that will help shove me along my way.

Now, here’s my problem. I’ve had motivation and incentives before, but they never seemed to work. I’ve readily acknowledged to myself that I don’t do well by myself. I don’t like thinking too much – not that I don’t like thinking in general, I mean that I tend to -think- too much, overthink things, make myself paranoid and jump to conclusions that wouldn’t have even been possible before. I do this when I’m alone, so…I hate being alone. When I was in the Army – have I mentioned that? I was…I was an intelligence analyst for 6 years, loved my job, hated the people in the Army, and now I can’t use any of my @&#$ skills in the outside world because I don’t have a college degree, but I digress – I had plenty of incentive to exercise more, to lose weight – you can’t get promoted or go to schools without being able to pass your PT test and have the appropriate weight – and yet, I never seemed to be able to push myself to do anything. Half the problem was that I didn’t have anyone to do it with that could do it right. I couldn’t work out with my then-fiance, because he was a freaking PT guru, and couldn’t work himself down at the level that I needed to be at. My sergeants were pains, trying to use trauma and whatnot to push me, when all it did was depress me. I couldn’t really count on any of my friends to help. So…there I was, alone.

I’m not really alone now. I’ve got Crissy here, and she knows what she wants to do, both to lose weight and help her health out. I’ve got Brian who will motivate me the right way, even if he might not actually do my exercise stuff with me…he’ll still support whatever I want to do. I’ve got friends all over battling the same issues, with either similar or different desires for the endgame, who will push me where needed. Lastly, I’ve got this accountability thing. Somewhere that I can see it, all in black and white, and feel good when I’ve worked toward it, and ashamed when I haven’t.

So I think my plan from here on out is to post here at least twice a day – once in the beginning of the day, about hopes and fears and dreams and wants and secrets. Maybe I’ll eventually find something that I can post every day – like some sort of quoting thing, or survey, meme…something, anything. Writer’s block exercises. Stuff that I’ve tried that I like. Stuff I don’t like. Something. Then, the second will come at the end of the day, after I have (as I should) done my workout, and the day is nearing its close. My WiiFit has me do a body test every day…so I may post what comes from that every day. If that gets a little too depressing, I’ll change it to weekly.

So – this post doesn’t have my actual goal…just my recognition of a need for a one. All in good time, my pretties.

Beautiful, beautiful

Eventful day today. Took the kids down for the last day of Wacky Wednesday (they go school next week! I can’t wait!), and since they had a lot of help down there, I figured I’d let them run around without having to worry about me at their shoulder and have fun. So I got Josh bathed, all that jazz…then once I went to pick them up and walk them down to Ron and Erin’s, Crissy, Josh and I were off to the doc’s.

So this was a new doctor – basically sort of a test-run to see if we’d want her to be our family doctor. She was really nice – very attentive, kind, and detailed, which I like to see. Poor Josh, though, is traumatized. We got his shots done last week, and pretty much…now I think he has a fear of people in scrubs. Or something. All I know is he wouldn’t let the poor nurse touch him, screamed the entire time we were getting his height and weight done – and that was all we were doing! – and clung to me like I was his lifeline. My poor little tot.

As far as my checkup – well, I’m overweight, but we knew that already. But my blood pressure was normal (which had been a little worry for me, after being induced for hypertension with Josh). We did, however, talk about my sinus issues. She checked my ears, nose, and throat, acknowledging, like all doctors, how GINORMOUS my tonsils are. She said that my nose was tight and swollen, and that it was obvious that I was stuffed up, by my voice. So she prescribed me this steroid nasal spray which, she says should help me once winter comes along and tries to make me miserable. I have hope!

She also prescribed me prenatals to start taking, and I’m officially getting my IUD out on Monday. She didn’t have the right equipment there today – which is fine, I know she’s setting up a new office and is getting a lot of stuff moved in and done. Crissy’s going in on the same day to have a well-check done, as well as get the doctor set up as her own so that she can get her prescriptions refilled when necessary.

We went grocery shopping after that, picked up some more dietary stuff for us as well as something for dinner. Got my prescriptions filled, headed home, and settled down for a little bit, doing my facebook games, a little talking, all that jazz. Then, I decided – it was time. Got the WiiFit out, had Ian and Caitlyn handle Josh, and decided on the routines I was going to do. The doctor recommended, both for my weight and for baby-prep, I do half an hour a day. The longest pre-set routines that I can put together at any one time are approximately 21 minutes, so I did one of the three-at-a-time, then one, and then I ended with the Warrior pose to stretch out and cool down after. My routines were, first, the Health set, which are titled Tummy, Overindulged, and Leaner You…I think. Then I did the Mind and Body routine out of the Lifestyle section (I think). Total time? 35 minutes. Not bad, eh?

So I actually feel rather good right now. Crissy had dinner ready literally as soon as I finished my Warrior pose, and it was rather nummy – alfredo pasta with chicken, and garlic bread.

The Scio Fall Festival started tonight…I don’t know if we’re going to go down, but I think we might tomorrow. If we do, and we walk…the WiiFit probably won’t happen. Anyone who’s seen our hill will understand why.

Ugh, Mornings

It’s the truth! I hate mornings. With a passion. It’s pretty much the reason why, anytime I worked at a bookstore, I was a closer, even though I didn’t like encroaching on my nights much either.

But, I’m up. It’s the last Wacky Wednesday of the summer, so I’m off to take Ian and Caitlyn down and help out where I can. Of course, I really just get put where needed. Heather May, the girl who orchestrated everything, pretty much runs a good, tight ship. My hat’s off to her for everything she accomplished with the kids this summer. Hopefully, some of them started of their path of faith and will continue on down.

My breakfast might not have been the greatest – biscuit sandwiches with egg, sausage, and cheese. On the other hand – I don’t tend to eat much during the rest of the day when I actually eat breakfast, and it is a good source of protein and whatnot. We’ll just have to see. I do already feel a lot better now that I ate.

Alright…time to go do something with this mess of hair and get going. Woo!

So, This is Me

Image

The title says it all.

This is me.

Heather Elizabeth Stromski, née Williams, aged 28 years, 5 days. I’m not even sure if I accented that properly, but I can’t be bothered to look it up and check.

I am the wife of Brian, stepmother to Ian and Caitlyn, and mother to Joshua…and seeking to be mother to another little bit within the next year or so.

Prior to my pregnancy with my son, I weighed 145, or around there, and was pretty happy with the way I looked. Then I allowed the idea that I was pregnant to mean that I didn’t have to watch what I ate, or move around more than necessary, and I billowed out. Even after I gave birth, I still didn’t weigh over 200 pounds, but now I do. My husband says at least some of it is the fault of my birth control, but I know it’s not all of that, and I know I have to accept the blame for most of it. So I am, and now, I’m ready to take charge.

So, the intent is to start out doing at least 20 minutes a day of exercise on the WiiFit, and my roommate and I are going to work at structuring a good diet for the two of us.

I did my WiiFit workout today, using the ‘Combine’ function and selecting the Form routines of Hips, Arms, and Figure. It involved several yoga positions, a couple of rhythmic aerobic and balance routines, and a decent bit of sweat on my part. I’ve discovered that burp rags (which we stopped having to use for Josh a few months ago) can definitely be ret-conned into sweat rags.

Tomorrow, I go to a doctor that may become our new family doctor. There, I will get my birth control removed, and Brian and I will start working on another chapter of our lives. Won’t that be interesting. >.>